Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
Randomize
