So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
Can u please come get me. My car keys are gone. Somehow I ended up sleeping in my trunk
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
You told me to ditch them in the park, and when she jumped onto the car to stop us, you told me to scrape her off against a parked Jeep. That drunk.
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
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