Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
I'm almost too hungover to function. Got into the wrong car by mistake. there was a rotweiler in it. Thank god he was more confused than i was for a minute.
He went snooping and now he's all intimidated by my super amazing box of sexy time toys.
Please stop calling it that.
I feel like I spent all day wearing underpants made entirely of poison ivy and sandpaper
I found more straws in my beard this morning. Please stop doing that.
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
Randomize
