his prince albert piercing just severely cut the roof of my mouth. can you pick me up at the hospital if he drops me off?
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
to which he commented "you must really like me on top". I didn't have the heart to tell him that was the only way the room stopped spinning
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
Just went grocery shopping with a vibrator in my purse and didn't even realize it. This is what Saturdays are made for.
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
God I need to hump something, right now.
Randomize