oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
she said i have a nice penis, i told her only bob saget and god could judge that.
i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
And then a tiny penis fell out of my purse
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
I just looked into the eyes of the man whose car I peed on last night
And then you told me I had large hands and looked like a girl who would have an illegitimate child that I never talked about
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
Do you think my laundromat will notice that the bloodstain on my sheets is in the shape of a face?
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
I just discovered my new vice. Cotton candy vodka. Its like a carnival in my mouth, puking of the tilt-a-whirl included.
Randomize
