I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
I gave his parents a candle as a thanks for letting me hang out there all the time. Which i guess is more accurately a thanks-for-letting-me-fuck-your-son candle
My new best friend is the drag queen who works at mcdonalds and doesnt judge me during my walk of shame coffee break
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
We need a shit load of segways right now
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
Randomize
