He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
when your hometown is famous for abortion clinic bombings, hurricanes, and jude law's newest bastard, its probably time to move.
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
What is this red stuff in a water bottle in my fridge that's labeled "not for baby turtles"?
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
I feel like god wrote up a contract of my life, and i just signed off on that shit without reading the fine print.
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
How do you tell someone who's buying a pregnancy test to have a nice day .... Like how
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
dude, there is no doorman in your lobby and the front door is locked
oh yeah, sorry he's up here at the party. coming now
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