The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
Using that mug my little cousin painted for me as an ashtray for my weed...at least next time he asks me if I'm using it I can say yes
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
the problem with having sex for lunch when its 98 degrees outside is that I can't tell if its sweat or semen running down my leg as I walk back in the office
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
I don't think it's food poisoning, I think it's cause you cooked it over burning styrofoam
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
Randomize
