We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
Nothing says 'good morning' like waking up only to realize this chick was watching you sleep. She's crazy
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
Why do pants feel so unnatural once you enter your own house
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
Success! We fucked roommates!
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
you know you’re single when you try to cook yourself a nice pasta dinner but you’re too weak to open the container of sauce and theres no one around to help you
"Why is there a bottle of Tequila taped to the fan?"
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
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