Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(603): View more from New Hampshire

That cute girl I hooked up with last night clawed my back to hell and gave me a hickey. I look like a white trash warewolf victim

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(848): View more from New Jersey

life lesson #1: a fart during an awkward silence between 2 strangers doesnt make it less awkward.

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(904): View more from Florida

someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.

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(703): View more from Virginia

You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.

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(865): View more from Tennessee

all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.

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(605): View more from South Dakota

How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?

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(828): View more from North Carolina

No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry

(828): View more from North Carolina

Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302

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(701): View more from North Dakota

I've had more orgasms than showers this week.

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(803): View more from South Carolina

Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all

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