Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
Who is this?
You offered to lift up your dress at the bar so I could see your lower back tattoo
Um, I think that was a general offer to everyone. So...who IS this?
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
Just fantasized about my boss's fingers in a meeting. I desperately need to get some.
The shitshow that was last night is the gift that just keeps on giving
Randomize
