I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
Hey when I die alone will you come by often enough so that my cats don’t eat my face?
Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus.
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
I just came so hard my vision went blurry. I can only hope one day I'll find a man that can accomplish what my left hand does on a tri-daily basis.
Just found the measuring tape in my bathroom. How drunk could I have possibly been on Saturday?!
Randomize
