As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
I may or may not have just sent the bartender a pic of me in my slutty cheerleader costume with the caption "rah rah ree, gimme yo d"
He just asked me if I'd be interested in couples therapy. Fuck my life.
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
She took all the bottles out of the shower caddy and replaced them with booze. I just made a shower Manhatten. Imma marry this one.
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
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