I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
I knew I was in the wrong bar when "I have a daughter your age" was some random's pick up line.
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
I won't apologize to a one balled man
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
Dude. I’m playing chess through iMessage with a stripper. What has my life become.
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
Randomize
