just come out here and I will go home with you...
Herpes is a lot like Arnold Schwartzenneger. Because it always comes back. Also, because it is usually in some way in control of California.
This last weekend single handedly took me off the liver transplant list
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
You can kiss the security deposit goodbye after you and your boyfriend did donuts on his moped in the middle of the apartment. It was impressive since you were both too drunk to walk.
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
Randomize
