i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
You're always so late and I'm always so drunk.
Sorry for trying to baptize you last night
You knew the entire thing in Latin I was so impressed
It's Valentine's Day, I figure for sure we'll have sex today, right? Wrong. I tried unsuccessfully for like an hour to get him to fuck me. Now he's asleep and I'm on my way to join the public library.
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
Randomize
