Sry I called you an 8
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
I just taped a plastic bag to my ceiling for the next time I have to throw up on the top bunk. Why am I so good at college?
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
I swear they were about to hook up!!
I know because I was in the tub taking an imaginary silent bath. They stopped cuz I gagged on my shot.
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
How bad would it be to ask my maintenance man for new blinds because the dude puked on those too?
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
We all love a big dick, but you’re going to develop a reputation if you keep asking every guy at the bar ‘how big your dick’
That’s all I’m saying
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