remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
I think this agreement was sent by God. I get to do my own thing, get laid, and he still makes me breakfast in the morning.
The bag I'm bringing home for the weekend: a change of clothes, workout shoes, and sex toys, that's it.
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
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