Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
i'm sitting pantsless eating potato chips and watching porn before he picks me up for our date. I hope he's ready for this...
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
She was telling me which girls she thought I should fuck or not at the bar. Why can't all one night stands be that cool after?
Just met me in 10 years...this lady keeps an emergency wine cooler in her bag
So, I'm playing the Doctor Who drinking game with my dogs, but they don't understand quite when to drink. Still counts as successful, though, right?
So it took me 20 minutes to figure out that this is the wrong blind date. I'm going to go with it, he's cute and at least it's free beer.
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
Randomize
