these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
my boss just accepted "because it's 4/20" as a legitimate reason to take Friday off
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
You know why I love being a regular at this bar? It's because at a certain point last call is only a suggestion.
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
Note to self: I can rip apart her vagina and she'll still cuddle with me, but if I steal her Chapstick she'll murder me !?
Randomize
