ive had 594 apples! thats 99 apples 6 times! math!
My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
I looked the guy across the room straight in the eyes and said, "If you were any closer to me, we'd be making out right now."
Bring scissors.....i think im gonna have to be cut out of this damn jockstrap
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
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