we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
I woke up this morning to 4 booty call texts. So i am trying to find the sign that says i like to sit on cocks so that i can take it off.
trust me, i wonder where that sign is on a daily basis.
best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
WHY IS MY CAR MISSING A DOOR YOU BITCH
budget cuts
YOU CANT BLAME EVERYTHING YOU DO WHILE DRUNK ON BUDGET CUTS
budget cuts are serious business
There's a naked man in my car right now.
Floor bacon is actually really good
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
I absolutely love waking up to see my phone search history is "xj" "qj" "cj" "uj" and "kj"
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
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