I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
well since you're still married, you will be paying for my abortion right?
I was so high that i was talking shit about a girl I was with via text, and I handed the phone to her so she could type the shit I was trying to say.
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
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