Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
there is this woman at the counter who looks identical to linda ellerbee. and she's grinning. COME. INSIDE. NOW.
Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.
you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
don't care how drunk i am. my dick was like "nope, not doing it, you can't make me and i was like oh yes i can"
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
Randomize
