Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
They're taking me to ER. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
Pi�atas plus fireworks don't mix well
Someone the age of your son tried to go home with me from the bar last night
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
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