I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
you didnt know i had herpes?
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
apparently it isn't appropriate to tell a coworker who is eating celery because it's "negative calories" that a blowjob is too
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
There's no good way to say, "sorry your son saw me naked on top of your brother"
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
Three Decembers later, I'm looking at this fuckin Santa lingerie I bought and just realized my stocking never got stuffed....
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
Randomize
