Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
When we were fucking, you could hear the beer sloshing around in my stomach
And the cops told us we were all naked.
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
Now you have tequila AND fuzzy slippers. Fuck you. I want that to be MY night.
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
The lady that was sitting beside me thought the best way to cheer herself up was to pet and ruffle my hair while crying and telling me her problems...
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
Things could not have gone more poorly if I had stripped naked and run through the Sahara with sirloins tied to my vagina.
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
Randomize
