so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
We've made a drinking game out of how many times the tornado sirens go off. We're good at tornado safety.
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
My walk of shame wasn't complete until I projectile vomited clutching my truck bumper while he just smiled with that look of regret.
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
Randomize
