Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
Found her in the closet eating mayo out of the jar with a knife
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
It was fine. Until I accidentally shit on his floor.
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
I just ate the lyft drivers bacon cheeseburger. Well fuck me this night escalated quickly.
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
Randomize
