I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
The online application for Mcdonald's said I could do incredible things there. Today I threw out shit filled underwear in the women's restroom and escorted a very drunk/high 42 year old man outside after he ordered a 5 dollar foot long and a bloody mary.
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
If I was gonna be at your campus for halloween weekend, I'd dress up as the masked horny fairy and give out condoms. I'm so thoughtful.
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
Randomize
