hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
he nicknamed his dick "too big to fail"
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
I had so much drainage I couldn't moan properly. Fuck allergy season
Never let him bartend when he's tripping. He sprinkled a ton of mexican shredded cheese over a jack and coke and called in a Monterey Jack Daniels.
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
Just peed off a cliff while playing white snake on my phone. Close enough?
I can feel your judgement through the phone
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
Randomize
