There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
She looked at me and said "i like penises." and then passed out with her condom balloon animal in her hands.
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
I told her I didn't have a condom. She then sized me with her thumb and finger and tossed me a large. Then I asked her to marry me.
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
Brb crying the tears of my youth
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
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