In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
I'm seriously so bored I'm seeing how many rooms I can masturbate in before I get caught.
Four. Poor grandma...
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
Bad news? she threw her drink in his face, left her phone at the club, and disappeared. I found her laying in bed with the bottle she stole from our VIP service. Good news is she's asleep and I have the bottle, come home
Thanks to a poorly written tweet a whole bunch of people thought I died last night.
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
Randomize
