im just gonna turn drinking alone on new years into a tradition
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
Bath mats should not be used at mops. they don't work. consider this a drunk psa
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
Her stripper name is Geico. I'm not drunk or creative enough to make this up.
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
Dude, the coffee is horrible this morning, Cass changed something about it
We ran out of Bailey's Irish cream...
This is what regular coffee tastes like?!?! Fuck the adult life.
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
Do you have feelings for this penis?
The best thing about last night is when drunk Lauren asked cop if she could smoke a joint in front of him. And next thing I remember she’s smoking weed with a cop. How awesome is that.
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