They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
Rooting for you and your team in the Beer Olympics this afternoon...! Love you, Mom
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
You can't buy drugs with a ziplock bag full of quarters, chuck-e-cheese coins, and a starbucks giftcard.
watch me
She called my landing strip a "vagina mohawk"....
Lesbians are weird.
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
You know tonight's gonna be a good night when your already planning on sleeping in a trunk
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
Seriously though, I walked in and he was holding my cat in the air singing "the circle of life"...
Randomize
