i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
I'm eating my dinosaur chicken nuggets in the order they would die in the food chain.
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
I screenshoted his dick pic the other day because it literally looked like a brontosaurus. Like that really tall dinosaur that eats grass. Like I wanna draw a face on it.
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
