i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
Last night, my friend changed all my contacts in my phone. I have been texted by Batman, Donatello, and Hermione Granger. I have no idea who they are, and it doesn't upset me at all.
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
You haven't lived until you've watched a retriever try to bring back the condom you just threw in its master's garbage
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
Randomize
