I heard we made out
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
I just got hit in the face by an old lady love handle.
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
Just walked past a girl wearing nothing but flip flops and an oversized sweatshirt crying by the front gates eating pizza. i just found your soulmate.
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
You told the waitress last night "What tip bracket do I have to be in to see your boobs"
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
Randomize