awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
My dream in life is to scissor with Ellen. I don't care if I've got a dick. I'll make it work.
thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
I woke up to him eating cereal out of my viking helmet with a shot glass. No idea where he got the milk.
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
Teeth make me feel like a dinosaur. Can you feel yours?
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
I mean I'm not saying I have my life together but I did just put nerds in a bottle of champagne and then drank from the bottle
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
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