I mean I'm basically single. Or maybe just an asshole. Either way.
I'm at a party with that guy you made out with on new years. He remembers your name!
I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
You left your underwear on the fireplace
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
After the 3rd shot, she was running around singing, "Twinkle Twinkle Big Ol' Dick, on your happy place I'll sit" to your brother.
Put that bitch's torch out. She's been voted off.
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
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