i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
Don't leave without me in the morning. I keep scaring everyone cause I'm sleeping in the bathtub.
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
He scratched off my spray tan. Literal nail marks down my back. Can't imagine what's underneath his fingernails.
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
just imagine me sitting naked on a toilet with a fully-clothed dude i havent seen in 2 years, trying to make normal conversation except that im covered in blood and he's helping wipe me down while i try not to pass out because blood makes me NERVOUS. And he's apologizing and i'm apologizing.
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
He offered me handsanitizer after a hand job, you can't tell me he's not perfect!
Places I vomited today: hotel bathroom, in the cab to the airport, airport bathroom, airport terminal trashcan, plane seat 18E, and the plans bathroom
Fun wedding?
Yes. Very.
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
Randomize
