Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
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