Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
He keeps trying to sell me the forks from his kitchen drawer
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
My lash glue is stronger than my sense of self respect
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
Randomize
