Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
Why is your signature on my underwear?
Drinking with birthday clown in the backyard shed at a 5 year olds birthday party at 12 in the afternoon. My life doesn't need any adjustments
This whole situation could've been avoided if you would've just let me open the beer
The investigator asked if we were sharing a pitcher of margaritas. I corrected him and explained that we each had our own.
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
Btw I puked in your glovebox
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