Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
I'm sooo using this pickup line: "Baby, its not the 2.5 inches... Its the 200 pounds behind it"
if i died would you start the facebook group?
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
my boss said she was surprised to see me this morning. i told her there's a time in a girls life she has to give up day drinking in order to make money for next weekend's alcohol. she looked so proud, i think i might get a raise.
APPARENTLY giving your friend one of your shoes so that you avoid the no shoes no service rule makes you drunk...
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
there is a dude in the bar with no arms getting fed beers by his friends
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
Randomize
