i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
Will you please bring me a line of coke at work without asking questions?
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
You went full blown lifeguard... You wouldn't let me sleep until I was in the safety position, so I wouldn't die in my sleep...
Lmao I should put that ad on Craigslist "in need of muscular and determined team of men to carry drunken birthday whore safely home"
VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY
Let's be real. I'm the Usain Bolt of running away after hookups. Fastest (wo)man alive.
Drake has all the answers
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
Randomize
