So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
my life is about to be the like the hunger games except with penises. and im going to win.
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
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