I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
im at a bar with my dad last night and he got hit on more that I did
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
I got with a bridesmaid and a server as well as put an $80 tab in rum and coke under the name Emerson Iglesias. Are you sure it wasn't my wedding?
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
Im just drunk enough to admit that I miss Hannah Montana.
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
Randomize
