My carpet still smells like piss and I THINK YOU KNOW WHY.
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
The best revenge is premature balding
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
THE MAINTENANCE MEN WERE DOWN STAIRS AND I THOUGHT THEY WERE MY MOM. I'VE BEEN YELLING 'GRILL ME A CHEESE' AT THEM FOR HALF AN HOUR
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
Doesn't matter how many times we tell him the kid's a freshman, he keeps repeating "cupcake boy shall be mine" and honestly you need to intervene
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
idk how I feel so profoundly understood by someone whose latest tweet is "labia majora's mask." but I do.
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
So I got a text from him saying "jacking off...thinking of you" I think I'm going to get a restraining order
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
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