it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
mom and grandma are in town. grandma wants to get drunk with you
And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
I also tried to drunkenly adopt a kitten last night. It didn't pan out.
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
He whinnies like a horse when he's cumming. I wish I would have known this before we got into a relationship.
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
The moment I was petting the giraffe was the moment I passed out
Desperate times call for desperate measures. But he promised me no small talk so that was nice
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
Randomize
